Oh the gross and nasty things that men do that I secretly laugh my ass off about behind closed doors. But if I were to admit that I find some things just as amusing as he does, I'd be kicked out of the woman's club forever. Just as men have their "man card," women also have a code of conduct that must be followed at *ahem* all times in order to remain a member of the club.
It's simple really. Anything that stinks like rotten eggs or worse, is wet and it shouldn't be with the source of the dampness being in question, anything that is dead whether it be from a vehicle or a crafty dog or cat, bodily fluids and functions and anything that would fascinate a dog into sensory overload is supposed to be off limits to women and make us at least say "Ewww." It's just the way things are supposed to be.
Unfortunately, I have fallen short on some of those things.
I had a girlfriend (what the hell ever happened to her?) who had a male Siberian Husky that absolutely LOVED to roll in poop and on dead animal carcasses. It didn't matter if he was freshly bathed or not. If she let him out by himself into the back yard he would always, and I mean ALWAYS find something to roll in that was so unbelievably foul it would turn my stomach to smell it. She was always mortified. Especially after his rolling sessions when he was freshly bathed. Now in front of her, I had to keep my composure and agree with nodding my head about how unbelievably disgusting her canine buddy is for doing that. But inside I was dying laughing because... well... it was just so damn funny! What a nasty freakin habit for any dog to get into. But, it wasn't MY dog so yeah, I loved it!
By finding so much amusement in that little scenario, I was putting my membership in jeopardy. So I have to be careful sometimes not to be viewed as "such a guy" to use some of my girlfriend's words.
As long as there are never any centipedes involved and the smell isn't so bad it causes me to gag, then it's all good. But I will NEVER pull Sweet's finger again when he asks me to. EVER. EVER, EVER again! He says that I can run him out of the room when I'm sleeping. Well, I'll buy that one. But when his drifts through the blankets and out into the room and I have to get up and leave the area, then Taco Bell should definitely be added to the list of places NOT to eat. That's just unnatural!
A little something on the sicker side of the amusement scale for anyone that enjoys a little Robot Chicken every now and then. I almost fell off the couch because I was laughing so hard first time I saw this clip. Hopefully I won't be kicked out of the club for this one.
So what is my point today? I guess it would be to look at the funnier side of things. Almost every situation contains something that can make you smile. Well, almost anyway.
Happy Tuesday! :)