Monday, January 16, 2012

The Purpose of Soap...

I hate to say it but there are some people in this world that really need to learn the purpose of soap.

Soap comes in many different forms and even though it may be labeled for one purpose, each one really does have multiple uses.

The types of soap that I can think of off the top of my head that are imperative to what we are talking about here are:

  • Bar soap- usually used for the purpose of showering but some kinds can be used to make your own laundry detergent (see below) and to remove stains on various items.  
  • Laundry detergent-  usually used for the purpose of washing clothing and other fabric items that are soiled, stink or are just plain nasty as hell.
  • Shampoo- This is a liquid form of soap that is normally used for washing one's hair.  In a pinch, it can also be used to replace bar soap or body wash (again, see below).
  • Body wash- This is a liquid form of soap that is generally used to cleanse one's skin in the shower or bath tub.  In a pinch, this form of soap can also be used as a shampoo (see above).
  • Dish soap- Used for washing dishes in a sink full of water.
So... hopefully the ass monkey that was in front of me in line at Speedway today that smelled like a cross between hamburger that has been sitting outside for a few days in 100 degree weather and Spudward after he's found a pile of shit to roll in will read this and take note.  The stuff is cheap and you can get it almost anywhere, including Dollar Tree stores for a buck and even some food banks carry it... but it never hurts to ask.

If for some reason the water is disconnected at your living quarters, it is possible to shower at any larger truck stop along the highways for a small fee.  It might even be possible to borrow a friend's shower depending on exactly how funky you have allowed yourself to get.  Usually, if people keep their distance from you, you are probably smelling pretty ripe and need to handle the situation as soon as possible.

This public service announcement has been brought to you lovingly by:

Hugs, Happy Monday and all that jazz!  :)

1 comment:

  1. Lanie,

    This reminds me of the joke about Lance Armstrong and the French.

    Why do the French hate Lance Armstrong? Because he showers washed his hair, shaves and uses deodorant.

    Chris :-)


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