Thursday, June 21, 2012

5 Things You Can do With Chicken Poop

#1.  Car Freshener for Your Enemies
Now of course I don't condone this and would never do it myself but if you are an evil, hollowed soul kinda person then putting a scoop of chicken poo under the front seats of someone's car that you greatly dislike in the middle of the summer is a great revenge tactic.  You can do this with other types of poop too but chicken poop has that special, strong aroma when it's heated by the summer sun and straight from the chicken's butt.

#2.  Compost Builder
On a more serious note, chicken poop is awesome in compost!  You'll need to let it "mellow" for a few months but believe me, it creates monstrous plants and a great harvest.  God bless chicken poop compost.

#3.  Believe it or Not... Weed Killer
When chicken poop is "hot" it can kill weeds.  I don't recommend this though because it takes quite a bit of chicken poop in a condensed area repeatedly applied.  It is along the same lines as composting and anywhere you put a large amount of chicken poop, two things will happen.  First, considering the amount to do this, it's going to stink.  Second, the dirt will be too hot to plant anything in.  I don't do this but know people who do it to get rid of weeds and grass in certain spots on their property.

#4.  Additive to Flaming Brown Paper Sacks
Again, I don't condone this type of behavior but if you are fresh out of dog poop, you could replace it with a few cups of chicken poop.  You'll need to make sure it's fairly fresh because chicken poop has the consistency of cement and won't smear as well if it's older.  Please don't ask me how I know that.  : /

#5.  Use it as Paint
This is another really NOT NICE thing to do but you could add water to chicken poop and use it to paint a message on a someone's car or front door.  I remember seeing a woman scrawl the word "CHEATER" across a man's white truck door in black Sharpie marker once a few years ago while I was bartending and thought that the message may have been more permanent had she of done it in chicken poop. That stuff is corrosive as hell and can take the paint off  if it isn't removed quick enough.  Kinda like regular run of the mill bird poop.


I don't condone any of these except #2.  That's what I do with the chicken poop that I pull out of our coop.  Sometimes there just seems to be so much of it that thinking of other uses for it just happens to pop into my head and I thought I'd share.

Remember... the title is things you CAN do with chicken poop.  NOT things you should. Well... unless you have been seriously wronged.  In that case, email me because I do have plenty of it and I'm willing to share.  In exchange for pictures of what you do with it of course.  :)  *insert evil laugh here*

Here's something interesting that I seriously HOPE wasn't really made with chicken poop.  Yep.  That's a lip gloss called Chicken Poop.



     


In my mind, I see a couple kissing for the first time and him saying something along the line of "Gee honey, that lip gloss tastes great!  What flavor is that?"

Her response would be "Chicken Poop."

HA!  I'd sure like to be a fly on the wall for that one!  Can you imagine?  I'm laughing just thinking about it!

Anyway... knock yourself out if you want some Chicken Poop lip gloss.  That's a conversation starter within itself.  In the process of acquiring the lip gloss, you are helping to pay for the part that goes into my chickens mouths to make the poop.  (If you didn't get it, buying the Chicken Poop lip gloss helps me pay for chicken feed.)

That's all for today kids!

Happy Thursday my Friends!

*hugs*

~Lanie

2 comments:

  1. hahah this is hilarious!


    my kids may actually try them as paint :)))

    thanks for the great laugh,
    check in inventory London

    ReplyDelete

Say want you want but be nice or be gone. :)